When you think about adoption, you may have visions of meeting your just-born child in the hospital and diving head-first into diaper changes and 2 AM feedings. But did you know that only 20% of youth adopted from the foster care system are over the age of 6? This means that the majority of older children in foster care are at risk of growing up without the support of a stable family and a loving, permanent home through adoption. With the help of Alabama Pre/Post Adoption Connections (APAC), a passionate agent of unification in the region that specializes in assisting families adopting children over 5 years old, this statistic has the power to change. While it may seem like a much different experience than adopting an infant or younger child, adopting an older child has refreshing advantages you might not have considered.
He or she is their own person.
By age 5, you’re way past toddler tantrums, potty training, and constantly asking “why?”. Most children have developed a set of likes, dislikes, and their own personality. This allows you as the adoptive parent to come alongside him or her and discover a shared hobby, whether it’s reading, biking, or baking a cake from scratch. You’ll experience a transformation along the way too – you’ll view the world through their eyes, seeing things differently maybe for the first time, thereby growing in empathy and tolerance.
While you may not get to witness his or her first food, first word, or first time he or she sleeps through the night, the firsts you do get to experience – the first time he or she calls you “mom” or “dad,” says “I love you,” or gets behind the wheel with you in the passenger seat – will make up for the earlier years you both missed out on.
Their past can be building blocks, not roadblocks.
While it may seem like you’re stepping into a world of unknowns in helping your adoptive child make peace with his or her past, you’re never alone with APAC. APAC offers monthly support groups, on-demand webinars, and free counseling for the adoptee and the entire family he or she is joining to inspire trust and understanding. Just like preparing an older sibling for the birth of their newest biological sibling, existing siblings in the family may need some extra care and preparation on how best to welcome your family’s new adoptive addition in healthy ways. When you experience those bumps in the road, APAC Navigators are prepared to point you to the resources that you need, offered at no cost to you most of the time.
Their bright future is in your hands. And your hands are full of resources to help them on their way.
Children who age out of the foster care system without a forever home are less likely to have health insurance, employment, or a high school diploma. With only 9% of children still in care on their 19th birthday in Alabama in 2020, this is incredibly lower than the 24% across the U.S. Youth in Alabama’s foster care system are also less likely to utilize transition services, such as room and board assistance, educational financial assistance, and vocational training. But these grim statistics do not have to predict a child’s future, thanks to the hope of adoption.
With your guiding hand backed with numerous state resources, your adoptive child will have what they need for a strong future. Children adopted at five years of age and older may qualify for financial assistance from state subsidies. Even if it wasn’t the case when in foster care, your adoptive child may now be eligible to receive Medicaid benefits under your care.
Alabama is one of the few states in the country that offers college assistance through Fostering Hope Scholarships for post-secondary education and training of children in foster care as long as they’ve earned a high school diploma (or GED) or have been adopted after 14 years old. The Fostering Hope Scholarship covers tuition and fees at any of the state’s four-year colleges or universities, as well as public community and technical colleges. Your adoptive child can also be paired with a mentor to help him or her best plan for future success.
The Alabama Education and Training Voucher Program is also available. It’s a federally funded, state-administered program that awards up to $5,000 per year for up to 5 years for school-related expenses to certain youth who are in foster care on their 18th birthday or were adopted after their 16th birthday.
With these resources, finances should never be the deciding factor on adoption if your heart is telling you to grow your family in this special way.
Adopting an older child is a fulfilling path for both of you.
Any change can come with challenges. But when you adopt an older child with the help of APAC, these challenges change you and your existing family for the better – into a warm, embracing home that builds and lifts each other up and an adoptive child who loves you back wholeheartedly. In the blink of an eye, you’ll feel like your adoptive child has been part of your family all along, just minus the pacifier and pureed food stages.
Let APAC help you navigate growing your family through adoption.
The journey of adoption is filled with unique challenges and rewards, ultimately creating an irreplaceable family unit. APAC offers a wealth of resources, information, and comprehensive support to assist you as you expand your family through the meaningful process of adoption. If adoption is on your mind, take a moment to consider the facts—you might be the transformative parent that a child you have yet to meet is longing for. To discover more about how you can profoundly impact a child’s life and your own through adoption, please click here.
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